Who am I?

Valentines Day – is it worth all the hype?

~ Nicky M ~ 1 Comment
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Let me make one thing clear, I am a total romantic.

I’m married to a wonderful man and I believe in love, gifts and sharing experiences together – I really do.

But I just don’t buy into all the hype.

We can show important people in our lives love on any day and in any way that you choose – not just the one day the card industry designates and not only with twelve red roses.

If you’re feeling loved right now and have had a great morning so far, I am genuinely happy for you.

But just so you know, you don’t need to wait until February nor do you need Prince Charming to shower you with love. You can sprinkle yourself with a little love any time.

Here’s my seven go-to things that I do when I’m in need of a little love.

I go to bed early – to sleep, read or just lie there and be grateful

I enjoy being girly – I buy sparkly things, wear make up, dress up

I pamper myself – long hot baths, face masks, candles (you get the picture)

I embrace my imperfections – I acknowledge that some days are better than others

I exercise – the gym, yoga at home or a short walk – it’s all good

I enjoy my food – nothing is off limits (but everything in moderation)

I buy myself flowers – why not?

Be nice to yourself, give yourself a break, love yourself just a little bit more today.

Nicky x

 

 

 

 

The key to being yourself, is knowing yourself

~ Nicky M ~ Leave a comment

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“Just be yourself”

“Don’t be like everyone else”

“Be yourself, everyone else is taken”

We’re bombarded daily by affirmations from people who mean well, are well versed in self help and genuinely want you to feel good about yourself. But not everyone is ready to hear how amazing they are and for some, it’s just downright impossible.

How can you be you, if you’re not sure who you are?

If you’re reading this and you’re really comfortable in your own skin, are in tune with your inner goddess (or god) and are loving life, then I applaud you from the sidelines (pom poms in hand). Feel free to skip this post. You go girl!

However, if you’ve lost your sparkle, struggling to see your worth or in general need of a boost…then I offer these words with compassion and love.

When I was at my lowest I barely made it through the day. I functioned, but lived for the moment I could crawl into my bed and hide away from the world. Everything was an effort as I was consumed with grief. Eventually I didn’t recognise myself, I had lost my sense of ‘me’.

When I realised I couldn’t carry on, I trawled the internet for answers on how to pick myself up from the proverbial rock bottom. It didn’t take long for me to realise there was no quick fix answer!

I had spent months becoming a shell of my former self and now I needed to begin the long and somewhat arduous task of rebuilding.

A very intelligent lady once told me that when caterpillars turn into butterflies, every cell in their bodies break down, they literally become unrecognisable in the cocoon, a primordial soup if you like, before they emerge as a brand new creature. When you hit rock bottom (and lay down on that slab for a while) you can’t go back to who you were – that person no longer exists.

It took a whole lot of digging and cultivating to grow into the new me. But I’m here to tell you it is possible.

First, you have to want to figure out who you are and have the belief that you can do it.

Second, you have to be willing to put in a little effort. You are going to have to question your thoughts and beliefs in all areas of your life and start making choices about what you and your brand stand for.

Thirdly, you need to start! Don’t panic – you can start small, right here right now.

I want you to visualise the very best version of yourself.

This is the person that you’d love to become.

Think about how she holds herself. What do people think when she walks in the room? How do people react towards her?

Think about what she wears? Does she have a particular style or only wear certain things or colours?

What is her personality like? Is she charming, friendly, professional, easy going?

How does she feel about her life? (Remember, this is the best version of yourself – so keep it positive) Is her happiness written all over her face? Is she open to new opportunities? Does she say yes more often? Or no?

Write a list or even better, create a vision board.

Read this article from the Huffington Post about why they work.

Start writing lists about who you are right at this very moment. Write things you like, dislike, need every day..etc. Read this post, this one and this one for some inspiration.

Remember to spend some time reflecting on your lists. This is how you start to get really clear on who you are.

It’s a small start, but we have to start somewhere.

The key to being yourself is knowing yourself.

Knowing the things that make you smile, come alive, look forward to, get enthusiastic about. The things that make your soul sing everyday.

This is a journey.

One with no destination, because you never stop learning, evolving, improving.

How about we hop on this train together?

What To Do When Things Aren’t Going Your Way

~ Nicky M ~ 1 Comment

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You know one of those days when you had it all planned, knew exactly how the day was going to turn out and what you were going to achieve?

Today was not that day.

My plans were hijacked, disrupted and fell apart. I tried to reorganise, rearrange and do the best I could.

But it was not to be.

And, did I comically roll my eyes to the sky, allowing the day to unfold and exercise my skills in flexibility?

I did not.

I became flustered, lost my sense of peace and played ‘catch up’ all day. It was horrible. I felt tense as the day became less productive, drained as I dealt with one difficult situation after another and unworthy as I began to question my ability to make the right choices.

On reflection it’s easy to see where the initial problem started.

I hadn’t expected my day to go this way. I felt out of control.

What I should have done was stop for a minute.

Stop rushing.

Stop trying to continue my original day.

Stop trying to be perfect and remember I am enough.

Instead of being concerned with how I thought people were observing me and how I thought I should be handling my day, what I needed to do was have a little self belief.

Believe that I knew what to do.

Believe that I had within me the ability to do my job with integrity, making the right decisions as each problem presented.

Believe in myself.

How often do we pause from our hectic lives to applaud ourselves, notice when we handle a situation well or compliment ourselves on a job well done?

The more we look for validation outside of ourselves – the more chance we have of being disappointed. By searching within we will make decisions that we believe in, decisions we can stand by. It takes practise to not look to others for the answers, but the more we do it the more confident we will grow.

Who knows you better than anyone?

You do.

Stop and believe.

 

Hey there!

~ Nicky M ~ 1 Comment

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Welcome to my little (read minuscule), corner of the web.

As I sit in my quiet kitchen (I’m home alone), I’m trying to find the right words to type, whilst totally being myself.

I’m surrounded by candlelight, there’s quiet jazz on in the background and all that’s missing is a glass of something bubbly.

I’m smiling to myself when I acknowledge just how far I’ve come – spending time doing the little things that make me smile is what I’m all about these days.

Welcome to The Shimmer Within Her – created after months of actively reflecting deep within myself.

Shimmer: to shine with or reflect a soft tremulous light

Within: deep inside, contained

Let’s embrace ourselves, all of ourselves – yes even the ugly bits. But let’s also work on ourselves to find the magic within us that makes us beautiful.

We all deserve to shine.

Nicky x