It’s okay to be you

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We live in a world where we are bombarded with ideals and suggestions for what to think, do, choose, how to act, where to eat, what to wear…

Social media is our basis for comparison. The ubiquitous presence of peer pressure has been experienced by all at some point. And we question ourselves relentlessly.

Are we good enough? Doing enough? Have enough?

Well, I’m here to tell you that you are enough.

A perfectly unique individual.

Exclusive. Exceptional. Extraordinary.

It’s okay to be you.

💋 to find pleasure in the things you do

💋 to want different things than the crowd

💋 to make choices based on your experiences

💋 to have your own set of preferences and values

💋 to dream your dreams and plan your future

💋 to know what you need and provide it for yourself

💋 to dance to the beat of your own drum

So evolve, grow, become, explore, try, find, do, desire, dream, be.

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The world needs you. The real you.

💋 xo

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Stay Strong and Carry On

Ever had a day where you wonder if it’s all worth it or questioned if you are doing enough or even doing it ‘right’?

If so, then this post is for you.

These quotes are my go-to pick me ups that I return to time and time again when I’m feeling inadequate, unworthy or just like I have no more to give.

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You can only do what you can and your job is not to do it all. Nor do you need to save the world or everyone in it. Your job is to do what is requested of you. However, we all know that the list is never ending… so this quote is here to remind you that you have a finite amount of time, energy and resources.

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It really does. Whatever your role. Whether you provide, create, care, heal, inspire, encourage, teach, support or entertain – you have a purpose and it is needed.

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We are so quick to judge ourselves when we don’t know how to do something or if we make a mistake. We have this unrealistic expectation of ourselves that we should act, look and behave perfectly all of the time. Well I’m here to tell you sister to give yourself a break! We should always, always feel driven to improve ourselves and raise our standards. Have high expectations no matter what. But don’t ever put yourself down (or let anyone else for that matter) for doing the best you know how to at this moment in time. Look for the lessons in all that comes your way – there is much to be learned should we put our minds to it.

Stay strong. Keep moving forward. Be fabulous in all that you are. Be authentic and never, ever feel you are not worth it.

You so are.

💋 xoxo

What Flowers Can Teach us About Authenticity

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My love of flowers is well documented on my Instagram account.

There’s something so beautiful about a flower when I look at it through a camera lens that I can’t help but smile. I adore having fresh flowers in my home and always wonder at the journey that has taken place to transform a small seed into this array of colour, scent and beauty.

Starting to live a more authentic life can be daunting. It’s about assessing which elements of your life no longer serve you or fit in with who you are becoming. You can feel lonely, even misunderstood or struggle to fit in where you once belonged. You may even encounter resistance from people who don’t want you to change.

But it can also be freeing, colourful and beautiful as you transform into the most beautiful and natural version of yourself. Some may see it as an opportunity to stand out, be different and blossom.

Flowers don’t concern themselves with what every other plant in the garden is doing and they certainly don’t copy or mimic other plants around them. They grow and evolve and become what they were always destined to be. Whatever that may look like. They show up every day, quietly occupying their own space beautifully.

Here are 3 thoughts to keep you motivated and reassure you that any path that takes you closer towards authenticity and being the best version of yourself is one that’s worth walking down.

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Be who you are. Stand out, grow tall, bloom. Be there as the truest version of yourself, not pretending or trying to be like anyone else. Be extraordinary, whatever your role – be great at it. Put effort into all you do, even if no one is watching. Commend yourself on a job well done and remember to love yourself in all your uniqueness.

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Wherever you are – be amazing. Claim your space. Your home, your work, your ideas. Don’t be concerned with what others are doing alongside of you. Focus on you and your little piece of the world. Make it work for you. Make it beautiful, fill it with things that inspire you, make you smile. Surround yourself with like minded people. Find your tribe, people who have great energy, who are great to be around.

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Keep growing, always moving closer to your goals. Your journey is unique to you. Don’t be concerned with what anyone else is doing or how they’re doing it. Don’t compare yourself to someone else. Don’t run before you can walk but also don’t focus on the finish line. The learning is in the journey. The path may not be straight and there may be obstacles in the way, but it will be worth it. Change happens slowly and one step at a time. Keep going.

Where in your life can you be as authentic as a flower?

This is a previously published post that has had a little makeover and a lot of love added.

 

In My Other Life…

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Years ago, I used to play a game with myself.

It was called ‘Things I did in my other life’.

Let me give you a little more information. At the time I was working evenings and weekends, whilst studying during the week to become a teaching assistant plus taking care of three small children. Hubby was working long hours to pay the bills. We were burning the candle at both ends just to survive, like so many families do…you get the idea.

Anyway, back to my game.

In my darkest, frustrating, unhappy moments I would imagine what my life could be like if things were different or I was a different person. When I saw something I couldn’t afford, or a place I could only dream of visiting or an experience I had zero chance of having I would simply say to myself ‘In my other life I’d have that’.

Ridiculous I know.

However, it was a way for me to enjoy something from afar without becoming too hung up on all the things I didn’t have.

I was visualising a better life without realising it.

It gave me hope and a belief to hold onto; that things wouldn’t always be this way and I needed that, because we were working so hard for things to be different.

Holly from Holly Wren Spaulding wrote a post recently called what would happen if… and  it reminded me of my little game.

What could our lives could be like if we imagined them to be beautiful and fulfilling, having gratitude for all we had?

What if we saw the lessons life wanted us to experience and learned that we are enough just as we are?

What if we were to let go of our expectations, stress and negative thoughts and spent our energy embracing the things that brought us enjoyment and excitement?

Not in another life, but right here, right now in this one.

Imagine a life where we could choose to:

Speak only words of kindness

Find something to get excited about every day

Say yes more often than no

Make friends with anyone, anywhere without fear

Wear a beautiful dress, just because

Treat our spouses like we did when we first fell in love

Like what we see in the mirror

Honour our values

Slow down when we need to

Spend time making ourselves happy

Notice the little things

Just breathe

Instead of replicating others’ lives, comparing ourselves or doing what we feel we should, how about we take a shot at listening to our own hearts, being authentic, or forging our own paths?

What would that look like?

Any thoughts? Let me know below…

 

Why you should embrace the glorious mess that you are

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The person you are right now was shaped, created and moulded by all of your experiences up to this point.

Everything you have gone through, watched, felt, lived and thought about has become a part of you somehow. Every negative thought, behaviour and suffering has embedded itself in your DNA and has had an effect on who you are today.

I went through a difficult time a few years ago so I truly understand the effect these experiences can have.

I felt a failure after the death of my younger brother because I didn’t function properly for months and crumbled under the pressure to ‘get over it’.

I hated feeling sad. I mean I really disliked it. I would get cross with myself because I couldn’t control my feelings nor stem the tears that flowed, some days without stopping.

I felt embarrassed because I couldn’t say my brothers name without getting upset.

I felt uncomfortable for the people who tried to show me kindness but who eventually found me too difficult to be around and so stopped trying.

I would get angry when people would moan about insignificant, mundane stuff because I wished that was all I had to moan about.

I hated all of these negative feelings; I tried to push them deep down and not acknowledge them. I tried to not think about them.

The truth is, I can never forget them. Never forget what I have been through and how these experiences shaped me.

Now I understand that it was simply part of my journey.

Mine.

You will have been on your own journey; experienced your own hurts, made difficult choices and plans will have gone askew.

You can never forget what has happened to you, replace it or pretend it didn’t happen. And why would you? It is a part of you.

Remember that.

⭐️ If you feel sad. Feel it. Really sit with it for a moment and ‘be sad’. Acknowledge that it’s there and that right now it is a part of you.

Eventually it will ease and you will develop gratitude as you understand the importance of being thankful for what we have right now. You will be aware of what is really important in life. 

⭐️ If you are confused. Be kind to yourself. Acknowledge that you don’t have the answers or know what to do. Then take a step back and allow yourself to come to an understanding when the time is right.

In time you will be more decisive; taking the time to see all the options and the make the right choices for you. You will become really clear on what you want and how to get it.

⭐️ If you are hurting. Feel the hurt. Let it in and acknowledge that something has caused you to feel this way. It’s okay.

Over time you will develop empathy. You will ‘grow’ compassion, as you understand that everyone has stuff they are going through.

These feelings are not a sign of weakness nor something to be embarrassed about. They are teachers. They can help us learn and grow and change. They are as important as all the positive, good stuff that happens in our lives.

Life is a balance of both.

You cannot have the rainbow without the rain.

You are the culmination of all of these feelings.

Remember that.

They made you. You experienced them all and they are part of you. They strengthen you and in time you will grow.

After all, you have survived every day up to this point.

You

The unique individual you see in the mirror and the beautiful soul that you are.

You

The glorious mess that is you.

Remember that.