Who am I?

What stories will they tell?

~ Nicky M ~ Leave a comment
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Life…such a short word to describes the enormity of everything you are and have experienced.

None of us really know how long we have left; what stories still to tell, actions not yet accomplished, memories not made.

I was reminded of this recently with the sudden death of a neighbour. Sobering thought how your life can change in an instant. The only thing we can be sure of is this moment, right now. It’s the age old saying of enjoy every day as if it’s your last – because it just may well be.

But do you enjoy your days?

Do you stroll through the sunshine noticing the magic, delighting in the detail, savouring the sights and sounds as you make memories?

Or do you move through the fog unseeing, experiencing the days as one long chore, the mundane day to day getting you down – believing life would be so much easier if everyone just left you alone?

Your attitude towards life greatly influences your experiences and that of the people close by. It’s only when you are reminded of how short it really is that you pause and take stock of what’s important.

So take a moment, right now and wonder where and what are your priorities? Don’t wait for a tragedy to enforce changes. Don’t leave things left unsaid. Don’t have regrets.

Make one change today – just a small one that might influence someone else’s day, make you smile or have a positive impact on your four letter word.

One day people will be reminiscing and sharing stories about you and your life.

Make them good ones.

Written in memory of my lovely neighbour, June.

What would it take for your soul to sing?

~ Nicky M ~ 3 Comments
how do you want to feel
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Radical thought, I know – I mean I’m guessing no one has ever asked you that before!

When I have a day where I haven’t experienced any magic, found any joy or felt much love it’s what I ask myself.

What would your day look like if you only made choices that were in line with what your soul desired and how different would your life be if your motivation was to create experiences that fitted in with these desires?

We are driven by deadlines, pressured by the media and spend most of ours days trying to prove our worth whilst comparing ourselves to the person next to us.

But what if you already believed you were enough?

What if, instead of running around like a headless chicken, you completed one job at a time allowing yourself to celebrate the achievements of a job well done? What if, rather than rushing onto the next purchase you spent time enjoying what you already owned? What if, next time you’re feeling bored by the day to day, you delighted in the detail and noticed opportunities for gratitude and learning?

I began to think about this and narrowed down how I would like to feel each day – contented, happy, excited, fulfilled, connected, grounded. Next I wondered what I would need to do to manifest these feelings without doing anything too radical. This wasn’t a fantasy imagine your perfect day exercise. This was a series of small actions that I could incorporate into my day easily. This was what I came up with:

~ laughing out loud ~ smiles ~ good coffee ~ gratitude ~ learn something new ~ music ~ a hug ~ creativity ~ engaging conversations ~ a quiet space ~ to feel inspired ~ glitter ~ self love ~ enough sleep ~ a hug ~ seeing something beautiful ~ family & friends ~ fresh air ~ exercise ~ books ~ remembering I am enough ~ self love ~ a project to work on ~ gift giving ~ time alone ~ something to look forward to ~ 

“Not an impossible list”, I thought after I’d finished. None of the items on my list were expensive or particularly time consuming. I’d surprised myself by realising I probably did most of these things sporadically – I just needed to do them more regularly.

What would your soul tell you if you listened to it? How would you like to feel each day? What experiences would generate these feelings?

I ask myself every morning how I want to feel. Then I make sure I do at least one thing from my list.

This is me listening to my soul. 

I am not apologising!

~ Nicky M ~ 2 Comments

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Were the words I heard recently, fiercely announced from behind a display of breakfast cereal.

A harassed looking woman was clearly trying to be ‘Super Nanny’ in the middle of a busy supermarket on a wet Saturday afternoon…unsuccessfully I might add. I gave her one of those sympathetic ‘we’ve all been there’ smiles of encouragement as I passed by.

There are times when I wish I could be that child, stamp my feet, hold my ground and not apologise for something I did or didn’t do.

How many times has someone bumped into you and you apologised, even though it wasn’t your fault?

How often do you fail to meet deadlines and apologise, even though the target was unrealistic in the first place?

How frequently have you felt taken advantage of, and apologised for your less than stellar performance, when you really didn’t want to do it in the first place?

I wonder how many of us fail to speak up when something clearly is amiss?

How many of us feel guilty for loving something even though it may be seen as not age appropriate, lady-like or not what everyone else is doing?

How many of us do things because we feel we should?

I’m guessing quite a few of us.

We receive pressure from many areas of our lives. The stresses and strains clear on many of our faces.

These pressures can leave us feeling guilty for choosing to spend time doing what we enjoy, acting a certain way or wanting things to be different.

“Let’s be proud of the quirky, sometimes inappropriate little things we do that excite us, make us smile and just make the day a whole lot easier to get through!”

I am not apologising for wearing red lipstick every day 💋 frowning when people forget their manners 💋 listening to heavy metal 💋 saying no when I need to 💋 going to bed before 9 o’clock 💋 lighting candles for no reason 💋 drinking too much coffee 💋 asking for clarity when I don’t understand the question 💋 not being able to drive 💋 nor speak a second language 💋 needing a hug every day 💋 thinking motorbikes are sexy 💋 buying heels I can’t walk in 💋 reading teenage fiction 💋 ignoring the telephone 💋 buying handbags I will never use 💋 not ironing…the list could go on and on.

This is who I am right now.

These are the things that make me, me and I’m going to continue to do them for as long as necessary.

Let’s all take a minute to release our inner four year old (tantrum optional) and share some of the little day to day things we feel passionately enough about that we’re not going to stop doing for anyone.

In your journey of self discovery, what are you not apologising for?

Nicky xo

 

Change your view, change your mood

~ Nicky M ~ 4 Comments

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“To see the beauty all around;

hold your head up high,

don’t look down.”

I said that.

I am a strong believer of choosing to be happy.

Easier said than done you may think.

I believe everyone has the ability to be happier, with intentional practise.

You have to put a little effort in here guys…particularly if you’re not feeling it right now.

Recently, I woke up feeling particularly flat. You know the kind of day when you want to bury yourself under the duvet never to be seen again?

My mood was not good. In my head the universe and everyone in it was conspiring against me. After a little pity party I knew I needed to do something, anything to improve my day. It was not going to change by itself.

I decided to go for a short walk and while I was out I was going to practise noticing stuff – beautiful stuff, stuff that made me smile.

And it worked. Probably a combination of the fresh air , a little vitamin D, the exercise…mostly I think because I had something to focus my mind on, a distraction if you like.

Here’s what I found…

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Nothing too taxing and it didn’t cost me a penny. But the walk was enough to pull me from my slump and I had taken some good photographs. I felt a little happier with myself that I had at least achieved something today and was just a little less hard on myself for then spending the remainder of the day chilling.

I wonder what you can do, to lift your spirits a little?

We’re not talking expensive, momentous or difficult – just something that you know will soothe your soul.

My favourite go-to’s include:

⭐️ Taking a candlelit bath – locking the world out for just half an hour

⭐️ Writing down the lyrics to a song that describes how I’m feeling – sometimes an 80’s rock ballad is all you need!

⭐️ Snuggling on the sofa with a book or Netflix – House of Cards Season 4 🙂

⭐️ Buying a present for someone else – always makes you feel good

⭐️ Planning my perfect bedroom on Pinterest – no limits on square feet and money

⭐️ Going for a walk – just do it!

Remember – you have within you the ability to change your mood, just by changing how you view your day. Just think about the next thing you need to do and always, always do it with love.

 

Imagine your perfect day

~ Nicky M ~ 1 Comment

pm tea

How fashionable is afternoon tea now?

I recently enjoyed a lovely afternoon surrounded by slim cut sandwiches, mini cakes and sumptuous scones – laden with jam and clotted cream.

I always look forward to the presentation with anticipation, each one slightly different from the last as the venue places their own unique spin on it. I get excited when the choice of lovelies are revealed, seeing them in all their delicate finery.

As experiences go, it’s definitely something that has earned a place on my perfect day fantasy.

What would you include in your perfect day?

It’s a question I ask the children I work with regularly. I learn so much about what’s going on inside their heads by what they draw.

Some kids draw the whole she-bang. Disneyland, riches, the perfect bedroom full of toys. Some draw their dreams. To be a fighter pilot, racing car driver or work with animals.

Some, however draw the simple things. Choosing to eat whatever they want for breakfast or a day spent with a family member they don’t get to see often.

What elements would be in your perfect day?

Over the years I have perfected my fantasy – I revisit it regularly as it never ceases to amaze me how it changes over time. As you become clearer on what fulfils you, makes you smile, has value and what is important to you, your perfect day will evolve and the experiences you ponder on, will change too.

Give yourself permission to daydream about your perfect day.

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How would it start, or end? Who would be there with you? How might it be different from the things you spend time on now?

You might be surprised by where your mind takes you…or not.