Even though I am just me
Even though I feel overwhelmed
Even though I have little time
Even though I’m wondering, bumbling, finding my way
Even though the fear of failure is waiting for me
Even though they say it’s been done, over and over
I’m keeping on
I’m inhabiting the quiet me shaped space that beckons,
“Come, come, come”
Is your life calm and quiet; with everything working in harmony? Do you have the time to talk to others, get all your jobs done and still have time to do something nice for yourself?
Right now you’re probably wondering if this is a fairy tale?
Most of us, at one time or another have taken our eyes off the ball, lost focus on our priorities or simply let our lives run us, instead of taking control.
We unintentionally allow our lives to become full of stuff we feel we have to do rather than stuff we choose to do.
You know how it is; busy at work, demands from home, a never ending to-do list, going from one job to the next, multitasking, people to see, bills to pay.
You know the feeling of the circus act who’s keeping all the plates spinning?
With little time to devote to yourself to recharge and the demands piling up, eventually it becomes difficult to keep all the plates spinning at one time and they will inevitably come crashing down.
And life becomes full of ‘C’ words: Crazy. CHAOTIC. C O M P L I C A T E D!
Your mind, body and soul can only take so much.
Something has to change.
It is so important to take time for yourself but how many of us place self care way down on the to-do list?
Your health.
Ensuring you are getting enough sleep, drinking enough water, eating foods that nourish your body and regular exercise is the starting point to being in optimum health. It doesn’t have to be complicated – a short walk every evening, a chicken salad every lunchtime prepared the evening before, a beautiful new water bottle to remind you to drink plenty.
Good habits and regular routines make our lives easier because we won’t waste valuable headspace making decisions. This will enable you to cope better when things inevitably get crazy!
Learn how to say no.
Obviously I’m talking about where you can…but think about it, do you really have to do everything, every day, all of the time?
Allow yourself regular breaks from the daily grind. Do you want to sit in the staff room with all the gossips at lunch time or would you benefit from a walk and time away from your desk? Do you need to hang out with that group of friends who bring you down or talk about work all night? Or would your time be better spent doing something creative or simply not thinking about work outside of work hours?
De-clutter.
Your home. Your wardrobe. Your work space. Your mind.
Having less stuff makes it easier to keep tidy, encourages gratitude and helps you focus on what’s important in your life. Try creating a capsule wardrobe this Autumn or how about challenging yourself to give one item away every time you buy a new item? Clear your desk every evening, writing a to-do list before you leave so you know you are ready for tomorrow and you can leave work, at work. Allow yourself time to sit quietly and assess what’s going on in your mind. It may help you become an expert on you and what you need in your life.
Creating space – actual and metaphorical can help you think clearer, make better decisions and feel calmer.
Can you create pockets of time just for you?
Whether it’s time to read, go for a walk, bake, do something creative or simply a long hot bath listening to your favourite tunes.
Do something just for you.
This way of thinking tells your body and others around you that you are important. That you value time alone to recharge your energy and spend time doing things you love.
Do one thing every day that makes your soul sing.
You have to keep an eye on your life, or it will become complicated, busy and cluttered. There will always be one more thing to do.
Plan time out just for yourself – it’s the only way it will happen.
Work hard at simplifying your life.
Think of one thing you can do today to make your life a tiny bit less complicated.
That’s Marilyn Monroe telling it like it is.
Truthfully. Unedited. Authentic.
She was being honest about her faults, her flaws and her failings.
She was confessing to the world who she really was.
Whether you liked it or not.
What if we showed our weaknesses, celebrated our quirks, embraced the sides of us that are less than perfect and shared the worst parts of our personalities?
And what if we were okay with it?
I wonder what your quote would look like?
Mine goes something like this:
I’m impatient, irritable and a little bit of a perfectionist. I make extra work for myself, I am always chasing the excitement and at times forget to just breathe. But if you can’t accept me as I am, then that says more about you than it does me.
It feels quite cathartic to spew my insecurities on the page and share some of the worst bits about myself with you.
I’m okay with you knowing this about me.
I know I’m not perfect.
I know I’m not alone.
I know this is who I am.
Give it a go! Fill in the blanks to create your very own manifesto of misbehaviours:
Own the very worst parts of your personality. They are as important as your finest traits.
They are all you.
Well I did recently and it got me thinking…of all the things that I want!
New shoes, a new winter coat, to paint my bedroom, that necklace I saw yesterday, some plants for the garden, the dog needs a haircut, a holiday would be nice, Christmas is coming…
The list could go on!
Afterwards, I felt so embarrassed at just how costly my wants were, of how superficial they are and how quickly I could just keep adding to them. I doubt the list would ever cease; I could keep adding to it forever.
So I decided I’d write a list of wants that cost nothing.
To see what it is that I value most – the things I want for myself and others to improve my life. I was reminded of the quote by Anthony J D’Angelo,
The most important things in life aren’t things.
I want to:
~ always smile when I see a rainbow ~ feel loved every day ~ spend time making others smile ~ see my children grow into happy, confident adults ~ find time to do the things I love ~ have time alone with hubby ~ laugh lots ~ be fun to be around ~ feel grateful for what I have ~ take pleasure in the little things ~ have integrity ~ be me.
Now that’s a list I am proud of!
And it was a lesson in gratitude.
⭐️ It shares what’s important to me and what makes me soul sing.
⭐️ It shows that I value myself and take the time to do the things I love.
⭐️ It says that money cannot buy happiness.
What is it you want most?
Write a list of wants that doesn’t include possessions and cannot be bought with money and see what your heart truly wants.
It was like a grey cloud that wouldn’t blow away; a heavy load that I just couldn’t shake off; an unwanted visitor.
I’m talking about misery.
You know those days when you feel down in the dumps, cant be bothered, can’t get your shit together nor decide what to do next – shall I scream, shout, cry or just go to bed?
Well that was me.
I felt overwhelmed by all I had to do, both at home and at work. I felt unmotivated and had little energy. I felt worried as I was having trouble organising myself. I was overreacting to the slightest thing and I was pretty sure I was coming down with something.
To be completely honest, I was getting on my own last nerve.
And everywhere I went I was surrounded by miserable, moaning people. People who were dealing with stuff, people who were having a hard time, negative people and people who were unhappy.
I’m not sure I actually was – but it felt like it.
The mind is everything. What you think you become.
Buddha
I’ve written before about what to do when things aren’t going your way and how I have to work hard to maintain balance, simplify my life and keep my intention of ease & flow.
But I know that your brain looks for evidence for what you believe to be true.
I was miserable, hence I noticed all the misery and miserable people around me.
I needed to change my miserable thoughts.
I needed to be proactive in ways to introduce a little more positivity into my day.
Simple, but not so easy.
When you don’t know what to do, just believing you are doing something, anything, can have an effect.
⭐️ By taking one day at a time.
⭐️ By doing the next right thing.
⭐️ By completing one task at a time.
⭐️ By looking at the moment, not the whole day.
⭐️ By believing this too will pass.
None of us have it all figured out, all of the time. You will have periods of low energy, full agendas and difficult situations. It’s in these times, you need to cling to what you know.
I know that I am loved ~ that I have survived every day so far ~ that emotions have to be experienced ~ that I can only do what I can ~ this too will pass ~ that there is something to learn in every experience ~ that happiness is a choice ~ you never stop learning ~ not to take life too seriously ~ your mind will reinforce your beliefs ~ change starts with you ~ self care is so important ~ the sun will shine.
Thankfully, after a couple of quiet days spent in bed at home, some antibiotics and a LOT of listening to what my body is saying, I feel a lot more like myself again.
Lesson learned.
Listen to your body. Keep your thoughts and your company in check.
What company are you keeping?
The Shimmer Within Her 