Find yourself

Exercises designed to help you nail who you really are.

The Worst Parts of My Personality

~ Nicky M ~ 7 Comments

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That’s Marilyn Monroe telling it like it is.

Truthfully. Unedited. Authentic.

She was being honest about her faults, her flaws and her failings.

She was confessing to the world who she really was.

Whether you liked it or not.

What if we took this quote as a model for what we want to say to the world?

What if we showed our weaknesses, celebrated our quirks, embraced the sides of us that are less than perfect and shared the worst parts of our personalities?

And what if we were okay with it?

I wonder what your quote would look like?

Mine goes something like this:

I’m impatient, irritable and a little bit of a perfectionist. I make extra work for myself, I am always chasing the excitement and at times forget to just breathe. But if you can’t accept me as I am, then that says more about you than it does me.

It feels quite cathartic to spew my insecurities on the page and share some of the worst bits about myself with you.

I’m okay with you knowing this about me.

I know I’m not perfect.

I know I’m not alone.

I know this is who I am.

Give it a go! Fill in the blanks to create your very own manifesto of misbehaviours:

I’m……, …… and a little…… I make……, I am……. and at times…… But if you can’t…….. then……..

Own the very worst parts of your personality. They are as important as your finest traits.

They are all you.

I want, I want, I want!

~ Nicky M ~ 10 Comments

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Have you ever heard those frustrated cries of a toddler desperate for some gift that their parents are refusing to buy?

Well I did recently and it got me thinking…of all the things that I want!

New shoes, a new winter coat, to paint my bedroom, that necklace I saw yesterday, some plants for the garden, the dog needs a haircut, a holiday would be nice, Christmas is coming…

The list could go on!

Afterwards, I felt so embarrassed at just how costly my wants were, of how superficial they are and how quickly I could just keep adding to them. I doubt the list would ever cease; I could keep adding to it forever.

So I decided I’d write a list of wants that cost nothing.

To see what it is that I value most – the things I want for myself and others to improve my life. I was reminded of the quote by Anthony J D’Angelo,

The most important things in life aren’t things.

I want to:

~ always smile when I see a rainbow ~ feel loved every day ~ spend time making others smile ~ see my children grow into happy, confident adults ~ find time to do the things I love ~ have time alone with hubby ~ laugh lots ~ be fun to be around ~ feel grateful for what I have ~ take pleasure in the little things ~ have integrity ~ be me.

Now that’s a list I am proud of!

And it was a lesson in gratitude.

⭐️ It shares what’s important to me and what makes me soul sing.

⭐️ It shows that I value myself and take the time to do the things I love.

⭐️ It says that money cannot buy happiness.

What is it you want most?

Write a list of wants that doesn’t include possessions and cannot be bought with money and see what your heart truly wants.

 

Misery loves Company

~ Nicky M ~ 19 Comments

 

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It sat in the corner, lurking in the darkness, following me wherever I went.

It was like a grey cloud that wouldn’t blow away; a heavy load that I just couldn’t shake off; an unwanted visitor.

I’m talking about misery.

You know those days when you feel down in the dumps, cant be bothered, can’t get your shit together nor decide what to do next – shall I scream, shout, cry or just go to bed?

Well that was me.

I felt overwhelmed by all I had to do, both at home and at work. I felt unmotivated and had little energy. I felt worried as I was having trouble organising myself. I was overreacting to the slightest thing and I was pretty sure I was coming down with something.

To be completely honest, I was getting on my own last nerve.

And everywhere I went I was surrounded by miserable, moaning people. People who were dealing with stuff, people who were having a hard time, negative people and people who were unhappy.

I’m not sure I actually was – but it felt like it.

The mind is everything. What you think you become.

Buddha

I’ve written before about what to do when things aren’t going your way and how I have to work hard to maintain balance, simplify my life and keep my intention of ease & flow.

But I know that your brain looks for evidence for what you believe to be true.

I was miserable, hence I noticed all the misery and miserable people around me.

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I needed to change my miserable thoughts.

I needed to be proactive in ways to introduce a little more positivity into my day.

Simple, but not so easy.

When you don’t know what to do, just believing you are doing something, anything, can have an effect.

⭐️ By taking one day at a time.

⭐️ By doing the next right thing.

⭐️ By completing one task at a time.

⭐️ By looking at the moment, not the whole day.

⭐️ By believing this too will pass.

None of us have it all figured out, all of the time. You will have periods of low energy, full agendas and difficult situations. It’s in these times, you need to cling to what you know.

I know that I am loved ~ that I have survived every day so far ~ that emotions have to be experienced ~ that I can only do what I can ~ this too will pass ~ that there is something to learn in every experience ~ that happiness is a choice ~ you never stop learning ~ not to take life too seriously ~ your mind will reinforce your beliefs ~ change starts with you ~ self care is so important ~ the sun will shine.

Thankfully, after a couple of quiet days spent in bed at home, some antibiotics and a LOT of listening to what my body is saying, I feel a lot more like myself again.

Lesson learned.

Listen to your body. Keep your thoughts and your company in check.

What company are you keeping?

 

It’s the Little Things 09.10.16 *The ‘Let’s Shake It Up’ Edition

~ Nicky M ~ 5 Comments

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This week I have zero photographs to show you!

Gasp! Horror!

NOT because I haven’t experienced anything that made me smile – however it was limited as I was in bed with an infection for most of the week, but because I thought we were due a little bit of a shake up.

Today the focus is on you; to get you really thinking about what makes you smile.

If you know what brings a little pleasure to your day, then maybe you can go about intentionally tweaking a few things here and there and adding a few well chosen ideas to your daily routines?

Let’s dive in:

💋 What’s the first thought you have of the day (before you have even got out of bed)?

Is it how much you have to get done whilst mindlessly checking your social media? Or do you set your intentions, telling your mind exactly how you want to feel today and the positives you are going to focus on? Can you think about what areas today may need a little extra care, laughter or love?

💋 What does your morning routine look like?

Is it rushed, grabbing a pastry whilst running out the door? Or do you take the time to sit and savour your favourite food, whilst calmly contemplating the day, read or write your to do list? Is it a fight for the bathroom or do you get up earlier to allow yourself the time you need?

💋 Do you dress in such a way that there’s a little bit of you in what you’re wearing?

Do you have a signature look, piece of jewellery, lip colour? Do you wear clothes that fit well and make you feel fabulous all day long? Or do you just throw on the first thing to hand without much thought? Even if you have to wear a uniform, maybe you have an amazing handbag or signature perfume to accessorise!

💋 During the day, how often do you go out of your way to intentionally make someone else smile?

Do you look for the good in people? Compliment them on a job well done? Talk kindly behind their backs? Enquire about their well being? Do you believe in ‘what goes around comes around’? What do you want to be known for?

💋 Do you put aside some time during the day to do something that recharges or rebalances you?

Do you spend time alone with your thoughts, reflecting on the day? Do you exercise, create, read? Do you show yourself some love, watch something beautiful, listen to something you enjoy? Do you believe it is important or that you are worthy?

In each of these areas, there will be a way you can enhance just one element to make it more pleasurable for you and make you smile.

Even the boring stuff! Honestly!

Take for example cleaning up after dinner – a job I loathe! So to improve something that I regularly do, I decided to add a little shimmer to the experience…

💛 First up – I bought my favourite washing up liquid and cute cleaning brushes.

💛 Then I transformed the area by the sink by putting the utensils and dishwasher tablets in beautiful pots and jars, on a silver tray.

💛 Next, I tell myself that after it’s done, I will reward myself with a cup of my favourite coffee, from my favourite mug whilst I sit for 5 minutes to put on my favourite hand cream and read a few pages from my current book.

Et voila! A few little treats and within no time the job is done. I haven’t done anything unusual, I’d do all of these things anyway – but I’m programming my mind to look for the things that will make me smile. Thus enhancing a boring, mundane task.

Up for the challenge?

Take one area of your day that does not make you smile and see where you can add a little fun, glamour, ease, beauty or enjoyment; shimmerify it!

Let me know below how you get on.

xo

Why Daydreaming is Good For You

~ Nicky M ~ 17 Comments

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Do you ever stare unseeing out of the window, whilst dreaming of another life; another time; another place?

I always feel they are like little pauses for your mind.

A delightful daydream just for a few precious seconds, might just be your mind curiously contemplating for something to be different.

You should take note.

Where does your mind go? What do you dream of?

It’s like a little nudge from your soul.

Something needs your attention, needs rebalancing, needs a little love.

So, next time you catch yourself staring into space; don’t berate yourself. Instead thank your psyche – it’s communicating.

The question is…are you listening?